Your Love

I am so thankful for your love. You’re that someone that walked into my life, making me realize why it never worked out with anyone else. Through the years I’ve been hurt so many times, in love by myself but now I’m so thankful for my one true love. You found me, we found each other, and “we’re great together” you say. I feel like I’ve been waiting for you for so long, someone to share my feelings with, my dreams, my fears and you listen. Trying hard to count the ways you love me. You’re so easy to love. When I breathe I feel you, sometimes when I’m walking I get a bop to my step and I think of you. I laugh. When I wake up I feel rested because all night I was in your arms. There’s so many jokes we share I wish I could remember them all but I’ve learned to just take in “the moment”. Fun… I laugh at you too…honestly I laugh at myself…because being with you makes me smile a little wider. I love everything about you. You’re so smart. I find myself reading your thoughts on your blog when I miss you...  and because I‘m so familiar, I find myself quoting you … but what’s funny is I can hear you loud and clear but mostly I like to hear you when your silent I understand more...and I too wanted love like I needed love. I knew there was something special about you. You had me at goodbye..as you continuously asked if you could I have a drunken kiss… I asked why because i knew you wouldn't remember it. I walked in the house and told my sister I think I like “him”…she told me you’re a talker and my panties would soon be laying on the floor but what I learned was I am a thinker… after loving you I find myself thinking of ways to take them off. Shit I dont' even wear panties Im a nudest now. I dance in your arms, hugging you is as vital as breathing, sometimes I need them…you make me better. Cautious with my heart, still I gave it freely I knew that I loved you and I remember always saying to you, “if I don’t, I know want to”… as we lay in bed you told me to say it again. I am intrigued by your intelligence, the words you choose, and you do choose them carefully; carefully enough to keep me…and I like it. Just the simple words…mines and yours make me smile…reminiscing about first times, movies we watched, mornings we kissed stinky breath but our love disguised it lol, love is blind but who knew trickled into other senses. I wasn’t lying when I said you’re different. I’m so comfortable with you; the way you make me feel about me makes me love you more. You accept me so it’s easier for me to accept me. No surgery required, I feel admired when I’m around you. Your eyes enticing me from a far, I feel like we’re the only people in the room. Small phrases, eye gazes wheel me in; I’m attracted to all of you. You make me want to have a “sex revolution” with “no judging” and “no rules” as we’re “spending time…living in the moment”. I love your quirky humor and positive attitude, looking on the bright side…when there is no bright side. You say “ I’ll manage”  and that’s when I think you’re the one….my one. I began to think of the mornings you wake up enthused laying on the carpet with your belly on the floor as you take out your notebook and your ideas flow onto the paper like living water. When you speak I listen, not just out of respect or because I adore you but I want to support you. Your ideas, ambitions, emotions, I see your drive and motivation in your eyes and I appreciate you even more…never let that die. Small things make a big difference and all the a small things you talk about are the same small things that keep me loving you. I think of the time we share and although it’s not as much as I want, I see the potential of what we can have in the future. Young black love. I see the reality of you being my one; and me being yours. I wish I could explain in words how much I feel for you but I can’t comprehend entirely myself. Emily’s lyrics mean so much more to me now when she sings “Cursed with love that I cannot express”… I understand.  I can’t tell you how much I care for you and you’ll never know.  This IS insane but I hope it’s permanent. Its funny how people say they fall in and out of love but what I’ve learned is real love is stronger than pride...it works if YOU work it. You’re a true gem, maybe a diamond in the rough but the fact still remains your worth so much. Ill wait for you...I promise.